He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
