Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
how does that bad decision feel?
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