it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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