carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
