she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
