would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
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