This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Randomize