My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
porn star boner night. come get it.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Randomize
