it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Randomize
