whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize