happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
