how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Randomize
