How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Randomize
