Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
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