would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Randomize