Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry ilovsbigones hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(214): View more from Texas

It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.

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(734): View more from Michigan

I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.

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(909): View more from California

i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.

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(630): View more from Illinois

Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.

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(516): View more from New York

They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.

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(334): View more from Alabama

I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me

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(219): View more from Indiana

They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college

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(252): View more from North Carolina

So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.

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(308): View more from Nebraska

She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.

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