does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize
