Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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