can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
