Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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