guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
