What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize