What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
