Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
