omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
