Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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