all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
