oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
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