If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
