Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Soap is not a condiment
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Randomize
