i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Randomize
