who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
