so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Randomize
