Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
