Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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