I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
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