Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Randomize
