Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
