She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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