3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
