I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize