p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize