After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize