You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
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