How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
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