youre lurking in front of me
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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