break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize
