It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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