if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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