Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
She told me I should be a condom model.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
