he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
